Godparents
by ell13
Summary: "Hello, Jellal and I have come to visit the child of whom we will most certainly be the godparents of." "...Wait, what?" Lucy never wanted having a child to turn out this way. In the end, she was just going to blame Erza. Sprinklings of the "Big Four" ships and some others.


**Disclaimer: I do not own _Fairy Tail_ or anything else you recognize.**

 **Author's Note: The _new_ longest one-shot I ever wrote. Yay me. Nalu is the main ship here. There's also mild Zervis, Gruvia, Jerza, Gale, Miraxus, and ElfGreen. And maybe a hint of Bixanna which I didn't plan.**

 **Warning: Kind of mild spoilers for Fairy Tail Chapter 450.**

"Hello, Jellal and I have come to visit the child of whom we will mostly certainly be the godparents of."

"...Wait, what?"

* * *

Lucy Dragneel was tired. She was waken up at 12 in the morning, and spent the next seven or eight hours or so feeling like crap. Having Natsu by her side definitely made the process of freeing the life form that had been dwelling in her stomach much easier (having Natsu by her side often made things much easier), but it nevertheless felt like crap.

Though, looking down at the precious being that lay in her arms, Lucy decided it was worth every second, and to have another child, she was gladly repeat it.

The sun had already risen, and a warm yellow light had flooded into the hospital room, illuminating the peaceful pink bundle that held her dear baby girl. Lucy would've been more than glad to just sit there with her child, Natsu at her shoulder, enjoying the beautiful peace. But Fairy Tail doesn't work like that.

* * *

The celestial spirit mage already knew that the course of her day would be changed when she heard the first stirrings of conversational noise outside the room. She sent a confused glance at her husband, not knowing what to do. She sat quietly as the sounds approached, and the speech became slightly more discernible.

"-wish we had kids…"

"...who...if something happens?"

"-a man!" (A slap could be made out after this particular snippet, followed by what seemed to be a round of indignant scolding.)

"...Natsu-nii…"

"...ugly...father…"

"HEY!" This came not from anyone outside, but from Natsu, who had suddenly slammed his fist on a nearby table, scowling profusely.

"Natsu?" asked Lucy, bemused.

"That freak ice nudist…" Natsu growled, ignoring Lucy, "The nerve! Calling my kid ugly; calling me ugly! I'll teach him…" As Natsu continued grumbling, Lucy reached the conclusion that while she only heard bits and pieces, Natsu's tuned hearing could pick out everything.

"What have they been saying, Natsu?" Lucy questioned, curious.

But Natsu was fixated on Gray's one remark, "He said, 'I bet the baby's ugly, just like it's father.' Lucy, can I kill him? Wait, no...But at least let me fight him?"

"You do realize that you already fight with him frequently, regardless of whether or not he has insulted you, right?" Lucy remarked, raising an eyebrow. Natsu opened his mouth to reply, but just then, the door flew open, and Lucy was suddenly surrounded by all her friends.

Happy flew up to the bed and landed on Natsu's shoulder.

"Natsu, Lucy..." Happy looked at both of them with a wide grin, "We have new a new family member now, yes?"

Natsu patted Happy's head, "You bet, buddy! Everyone, meet my daughter!" With a grandiose sweep of his arms, he gestured over to Lucy, who cradled the kid in her arms.

What happened next, Lucy could only describe as "chaos." The room erupted into high-pitched coos and yells of excitement and approval.

"Congratulations, Natsu-san, Lucy-san! She's so cute!" said Wendy sweetly, Carla standing next to her.

Lucy thanked her enthusiastically, "Soon enough, you might be having one of your own, Wendy!"

Wendy blushed, "Eh? Oh, no, I-!" Lucy laughed at the younger girl's reaction. Wendy had grown a lot from that shy, clumsy kid. Additionally (much to Wendy's delight), her appearance had changed. She had grown taller, and was now developing into a fine young woman. But some things never change, Lucy thought, as Wendy waved her hands frantically and bashfully dismissed Lucy's statement.

"I'm not ready for Wendy to have a family down quite yet," Carla admitted with a tired smile, "She's a handful by herself. You wouldn't believe how much she talked this morning about visiting you. Congrats, by the way, you two." Lucy giggled, and thanked her too.

Then things went down as Gray approached, Juvia clinging to his arm, beaming.

"Congratulations, Lucy," Gray told her, then addressed Natsu, "Thank goodness that it doesn't seem to take after you, Flame Butt."

"Oi! My daughter is going to be the prettiest and strongest and smartest and awesome-est girl in Fairy Tail! She'll be a billion times better than your kids, and Erza's kids, and Gajeel's kids, and Laxus' kids-" Natsu ranted angrily.

"That'll all be from Lucy. Plus, when I have kids, they're going to whoop your kids' butts, and Erza's kids' butts, and Gajeel's kids' butts, and Laxus' kids' butts, along with Erza's, Gajeel's, and Laxus' own butts. And yours!" Gray said smugly.

"You little-"

As Lucy watched this confusing exchange, a dark figure appeared behind Natsu, making him freeze.

"Oh?" Erza asked, her voice low and dangerous, "What's this I hear?" As she dragged Natsu and Gray out of the room by his hair, Natsu sent one last pitiful look at Lucy.

"Help," he squeaked. Lucy nodded to the baby in her hands and mouthed "Sorry."

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

* * *

After Natsu and Gray were brought back, looking traumatized, Juvia approached.

"Lucy and Natsu-san's baby really is adorable. Juvia always wanted to have kids..." Juvia said in a pouty way.

"I'm sure you would be a great mother Juvia," Lucy replied genuinely.

"Yeah...Gray, can we have 30 of these?!" Juvia exclaimed excitedly, pointing to the sleeping girl.

"Wh-what?" Gray sweat dropped, "W-well, maybe not th-thirty, but-"

"YAAAY!" Juvia tackled him. She pulled out a swelling bag from somewhere in her dress (Lucy wasn't sure where the girl had hid it, the bag was bound to be extremely noticeable), "It's okay if we don't have thirty kids. I already only knitted 20 of these!"

"Only twenty?!"

Lucy watched her friends with a confused smile. Juvia had calmed down a lot since Gray finally accepted her-though Lucy speculated he had for a while-but it was still interesting to watch the two interact.

"Natsu-nii!" a voice called out from beside her, as a pale hand reached out toward Natsu. Lucy squeaked in shock.

Speaking about interesting interactions…

"Onii-chaaaaaan," Natsu whined childishly, wrapping his brother in a hug, "Couldn't you have told me you were coming earlier?"

"I wanted it to be a surprise!" replied Zeref, then stopped to wipe a tear from his eye, "I'm sorry, I never thought...that I would be an uncle someday. Thank you, Natsu, Lucy."

"Hey, was that an insult?" Natsu said teasingly, "How dare you doubt my ability to charm the ladies!" Zeref grinned in response.

Zeref Dragneel. The former notorious black wizard previously dubbed the most evil and powerful mage ever. Nowadays, he was Lucy's deceased brother-in-law (she could never get over that).

Lucy tilted her head and stared over at the two brothers. They were now both laughing about something lightheartedly. They seemed truly, genuinely happy. Watching them, Lucy couldn't help but smile, too. It seemed that even the most evil of villains could change their ways, and could be forgiven. In fact, most of the people she knew reinforced this: Laxus and the Raijinshuu, Juvia, Gajeel, Jellal, Minerva, Flare, Lyon… And that was a wonderful thing, she thought.

"Ah, yes, it's beautiful to see Zeref smile like that. I don't recall ever seeing him happier."

Lucy turned around to meet the spirit of the first master.

"Master Mavis?" Lucy asked, "Th-thank you for coming!"

"No problem, no problem," Mavis smiled, giving Lucy a ghostly wink, "I wanted to meet the newest addition to Fairy Tail! She's so cute…" Mavis stared at the baby in a trance, before composing herself.

The ghost girl looked around quickly, before leaning in to whisper, "Also, I'm here to chaperone Zeref. He hasn't quite gotten used to ghostliness yet." There was a pause as she giggled. "He's gotten stuck in between walls a couple times when he's not paying attention." Lucy wondered if she would become a ghost after death, and what that would do to her physical being. She wondered if she would get to see Natsu and the others should she become a spirit. Then, as she irrelevantly thought about all the times Natsu and Happy complained about her weight, she pondered whether ghosts could gain weight. Probably not...

"Anyway," the other blonde continued, interrupting Lucy's thoughts, "It just shows that the wickedest hearts can learn to truly accept love too, yes?"

Lucy frowned, "How did you know what I was thinking? About how people can change?"

Mavis winked again, "You and I are not so different, Lucy." She then lowered a voice once more, "And don't worry, I speculate they were just kidding about your weight...probably." With a chuckle, the first master floated away to the other side to the room.

"Probably?!" Lucy yelped.

"Ah-ah, Lucy, it isn't very becoming of a fairy to shout like that," reprimanded Evergreen, who had somehow popped up beside Lucy. Behind her, were Laxus, Mira, Freed, Bickslow, Lisanna, and Elfman.

"No, it's very...man!" announced the middle Strauss sibling, "Lucy, it's very man of you to have a kid." Evergreen crossed her arms and whipped around at Elfman.

"Stop babbling on and on about men, idiot!" Evergreen pouted, "When are we going to have kids?"

"Since when did you care?!" argued Elfman.

"I-It's not like it matters or anything!" Evergreen huffed indignantly. She made a grandiose sweeping gesture over to Erza and Jellal, who were chatting with Natsu, Zeref, and Mavis in the corner. "It's just that I've noticed that they have been closer as of recently."

"So?"

"So?! Pretty soon, they're going to settle down, and then Erza's going to have a kid before me!" Evergreen wailed dramatically, "I can't let her best me! Lucy may have gotten first place, but I have to be second!"

Everyone gathered around Lucy looked at Evergreen questioningly. Even the baby seemed to shuffle uncomfortably in Lucy's arms at the tension caused by the surprising amount of competition on achieving motherhood first.

"Well then!" Mirajane announced loudly, breaking the unnecessary tension, "I'm very glad for you, Lucy! Natsu, too! Your girl is absolutely gorgeous!"

"Yes, yes!" Lisanna continued enthusiastically, "Ooh! Can I be like the aunt? Just for now? Nee-san and Elflman-nii-chan are taking way too long." Standing in the back, Laxus made an awkward grunting noise, and Evergreen huffed again.

"Ahaha, sure Lisanna!" Lucy giggled, hoping she wasn't offending the persons mentioned above, for that would be extremely painful for her. She stared down lovingly at her child, "Wouldn't you like that, sweetie? Now you have Auntie Lisanna to take care of you too!"

"Ooh! Me too!" then added Bickslow eagerly, "I love babies!"

"Babies! Babies!" his dolls repeated with equal vigor.

"Um..sure?" Lucy answered, looking nervously over at Zeref, and wondering of how the child's actual uncle would take this.

"Ahh, wouldn't it be nice to have a child?" Mirajane declared wistfully, "Right, Laxus?"

"Why are you asking me?" replied Laxus awkwardly.

Mirajane sighed, "No reason. Anyway, since Lisanna and Bickslow are the aunt and uncle, I can be the grandmother, right?"

"Uh, well-" Lucy began. She never finished, because just then, Erza strided over, her blue-haired partner in tow, as always.

"Oh, yes, Lucy!" Erza called, "I almost forgot!"

As the knight approached, step by step, Lucy felt an enormous sense of dread descend upon her. Something really disruptive was going to happen, and Erza would be the trigger that would start it all.

The seconds passed away far too quickly. Without warning, Erza was there, and was opening her mouth to speak. Time slowed down, as Lucy braced herself for whatever disaster would arrive next.

Then, it happened.

"Hello, Jellal and I have come to visit the child of whom we will mostly certainly be the godparents of."

"...Wait, what?"

* * *

Unlike Lucy expected, there was a delay between peace and total chaos after Erza's statement. At first, her fellow guildmates were fairly calm at the bold declaration.

Mira had turned towards Lucy, a relaxed smile on her lips, "Oh, Lucy, so Erza's going to be the godmother?"

"Well, um-" Lucy started, uncomfortably. Everyone was too okay with it. And that wasn't right. To compare, Lucy thought back to the ball after the Grand Magic Games, and the fight between the guilds over Yukino. And seeing how competitive Evergreen had been over having a baby before Erza...who knew what the guild would do?

When Lucy took just a second too long to respond, Erza butted in again.

"Oh? So you haven't considered who you wanted to protect and nurture and love your lovely darling little girl should anything ever happen to you or Natsu?" Erza asked, her tone different. Whatever it was, her mood-and the situation-had definitely changed...for the worse.

Mirajane sent a grin at Erza that didn't reach her normally warm eyes, then glanced back at Lucy, "Oh, but Lucy: when you choose that person, I would recommend a person who has had lots of experience with taking care of younger kids. A kind, caring lady or gentleman who would set a good example for your child, and not someone who is reckless, destructive, and could possibly harm your child because of their lack of experience."

"Do you have something to say, Mirajane?" asked Erza, beaming with gritted teeth.

"Oh, no, I was just giving Lucy a very helpful suggestion to not make someone like you the godmother of her child," said the white-haired model, innocently.

"Why you-" Erza growled, all pretenses of friendliness have disappeared. As she prepared to requip into something more dangerous, Jellal grabbed her hand panickedly, which did succeed in pausing her for a moment.

"Erza, please, this really isn't necessary. If Mira wants to be the godmother then-" Jellal froze as Erza glared at him murderously. Mirajane only cackled.

"You should really listen to your man, Erza," jeered Mirajane, still using a sweet tone, "Such a nice boy, isn't he?"

"I don't know about that," chimed another voice.

Lucy turned her head to see that Evergreen, Lisanna and Bickslow had closed in as well (to her utmost horror).

"Oh please," scoffed Evergreen, "Only a true woman like me could ever handle the responsibility of taking care of a child."

"But I asked to take care of the baby first, and I've been friends with Natsu since we were little kids," Lisanna argued. Oh, yeah, Natsu, Lucy thought. Where is he, and why isn't he helping me? Looking out of the corner or her eye, she spotted him chatting casually with Juvia. She tried signaling him over, but he failed to notice. Traitor.

"And since there are no candidates for godfather, and I'm the uncle, I'm godfather my default, right?" Bickslow queried. As Lucy had previously worried, this at last caught the attention of Zeref. The ghost floated over to the scene, frowning.

"What's this?" he asked Lucy, "Why are people arguing?"

Lucy waved her hands hurriedly, "It's nothing you need to worry about, really!" Zeref was prepared to shrug and leave, until Mavis skipped over.

"Oh!" the first master clapped, "Goodie! You're choosing your child's godparents, Lucy? Ah, I was a godparent once…" As she said this, a sad look crossed her face as she remembered Makarov's birth.

Zeref blinked, then patted Mavis' shoulder comfortingly, "God...parents? I'm sorry, Mavis. That was...my fault. I guess this is why you're handing the position of 'uncle' over to Bickslow, Lucy. I understand."

"No, it's not your fault, Zeref," Mavis said, hugging him. Well, this was turning into a depression fest quickly. As Lucy saw their downcast expression growing more solemn by the second, she panicked again.

"No, no, no!" Lucy yelled, afraid that the two were both going to start crying, "Zeref, you're still an uncle! Why wouldn't you be?"

"Wait, so I'm not the uncle?" Bickslow asked dejectedly.

"Yes! No!" Lucy cried, cringing in bemusement.

"If Zeref's the uncle, am I an honorary aunt?" asked Mavis, suddenly more cheerful again.

"But what about me?" whined Lisanna.

"Wait, so what's the big deal again?" Laxus interjected.

"So who are the godparents, then?" Freed questioned, just as confused as everyone else.

"MIRAAA!" Erza shrieked, "FIGHT ME!"

Jellal sighed, "This should've never happened."

"I'm going to beat you, Erza!" Evergreen proclaimed.

Mirajane scowled, "She wasn't talking to you!"

"Man!" Elfman shouted.

And the argument continued as such, gradually increasing in intensity and violence.

As her child began to whimper, Lucy decided that she was done with this, and was going to take action.

"ENOUGH!" Lucy yelled, squeezing her eyes closed in frustration. The room now silent, she opened her eyes again and glared at everyone.

"I already made my decision a while ago! Since they were the some of the only mature ones to not fight like little children, Gajeel and Levy are the godparents!" Lucy announced angrily, "Isn't that right, Natsu?"

"What?" replied her husband, finally taking note of what was happening over with his wife and daughter. He was met with a deadly stare.

"Oh, totally!" Natsu agreed, kind of catching on, "Gajeel's been my best buddy forever! And Levy, ah...she's really smart!"

"Exactly," Lucy stated. She exhaled deeply, having calmed down some by now, "Thanks also to Gray, Juvia, Wendy, Happy, Carla, and Lily."

Lucy sighed, then added, "And I guess Laxus, Freed, and Jellal didn't really do anything either. Thank you. But for those of you who were in the fray…" She sent one last glare their way, and turned to comfort her child.

After that, there was almost peace and quiet, aside from the murmurings of apologies here and there. Mostly content, Lucy smiled to herself. But the day had one more surprise for her…

* * *

Around 7 minutes after the huge blowout, Lucy was back to gently cradling her baby, and Natsu had returned to sitting at the bedside, watching them. Her guildmates watched in general peace, with an occasional girlish squeal, excited exclamation, and etc.

Then, Gajeel stood up, and sat by Natsu and Lucy, facing the couple.

"Gajeel!" Lucy greeted, "We haven't talked to you yet, have we?"

"Nope," the Iron Dragon Slayer confirmed, "And I want to thank you and Salamander for this offer to Levy and I, but-"

"No problem, Gajeel!" Natsu interrupted, giving a cheeky smile.

Gajeel frowned at him, before continuing, "But I have to politely decline."

Cue: everyone to stare blankly at Gajeel.

"Whaaaaaaaaaaaaat?!" they all cried out.

"Hey, wait!" Lucy exclaimed, "Why? Wait, where is Levy anyway?"

"Gihi," chuckled Gajeel. He stood up, waltzed over to the door, and opened it, revealing a smiling Levy waiting there.

"Hi Lu-chan, Natsu!" Levy waved, "I kind of wanted to announce this at the guild, but...I'm pregnant!" Lucy gaped at her friend, then looked back at the smirking Gajeel.

"What-when?" Lucy stuttered.

"We found out a couple months ago," Gajeel stated proudly.

"Aaaah, but Levy, you're still so thin!" complained Lucy, "I'm so jealous!"

Levy giggled, "Ah, don't say that, Lu-chan! Natsu and Happy were just kidding when he called you a hippo!"

"Leeeeevy!" exclaimed Lucy, embarrassed.

"So, yeah!" Levy laughed to their friends, "That's that!" No one said anymore for a good while, until...

"...Say, Levy," Erza started, "Have you and Gajeel chosen the godparents of your child yet?"

"No, Erza," warned Jellal.

"Yes, Erza," replied Erza.

"Oh, you want to go again, Erza?" asked Mirajane.

"Oh, you bet, Mirajane," the redhead replied.

Lucy watched in exasperation as her friends left her to go crowd around and fight over Levy and Gajeel's unborn child. Here we go again.

"Levy, you should pick me!"

"The best godparent is a true man!"

"I would be really happy if Gajeel-kun and Levy-san made Juvia the godmother. Juvia really loves kids!"

"It would be a shame to see you child fall into the hands of an idiot like Natsu...so I should be the godfather, definitely."

"Babies, babies!'

"Carla, what if we could be the godparents together?"

"ROAR OF THE FIRE DRAGON!"

Being officially ditched by all her friends and even her husband, Lucy just wanted to go to sleep.

Before she was able to drift off though, she noticed that the spirits of Mavis and Zeref were still lingering.

"Zeref, Mavis, you're the new godparents," Lucy told them, making a fatigued gesture to her daughter, "Please watch over her."

"Yay!" Mavis exclaimed, hopping up and down.

"Wait," Zeref realized, "But nothing bad has happened to you or Natsu."

Tiredly, Lucy glanced over at Natsu, who was currently picking a fight with Mirajane and Erza over godparenting rights.

"Nope, we may as well both be incapacitated," Lucy concluded, "Whatever. I'm tired. I'm going to take a nap."

With her baby in her arms, and two sets of ghostly eyes observing her intently, Lucy fell into a deep sleep.

 **A/N: Wow. This was fun! Out of all my Fairy Tail OTPs (Big Four plus Zervis and Miraxus), Nalu is one of my lesser ones, but this was _really, super enjoyable_. Sorry if stuff is out of character, and I didn't proofread, and I _really_ don't know the responsibilities and qualifications of godparents, so there are probably quite a lot of inaccuracies. Sorry! Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this!**


End file.
